15. I Can’t Keep the Black Man Down

Tonight‘s story does not involve a passenger, but it does involve an individual I encountered while out driving.

 

I was closing off my night and stopped at a downtown gas station to fill up my tank. As I was pumping the gas, a man stumbled towards me. He looked homeless, his clothes were dirty and worn out, his hair disheveled, and he stumbled as if intoxicated. I figured he was going to ask me for some money and in my head I was working on my reply. It had been a long night dealing with many a drunken passenger and I wasn’t feeling like dealing with another drunk.

 

He stopped about ten feet from me, looked at me, and started shouting.

 

“Look at you!” he screamed, “Standing there in your black shirt and your black shorts and your black hat, putting gas into your black car, you think you can keep the black man down? You can’t keep the black man down!”

 

I stood there and said nothing. I didn’t know what to say. He was g asking for money. He wasn’t armed. He was a safe distance. I was confused about what was happening. I looked around to see if anybody else was watching. There were a few people inside the Circle K, but nobody seemed to be watching us.

 

The man then shouted names at me: Tamir Rice… George Floyd… Philando Castile… Breonna Taylor… Ahmaud Arbery… names I was familiar with, names I think we should all be familiar with. He certainly was. I still was unsure what they it had to do with me pumping gas.

 

I didn’t move and just stood there wondering what was going to happen next. I didn’t know what to say to him or how to respond.

 

He shouted, “Say their names! Say their names!”

 

At this point, two other men came running up from the same direction the man had stumbled from. Reinforcements? I thought I might be in some serious trouble and looked back at the store. There were two guys watching through the glass door but not looking to intervene.

 

The two new guys stood on either side of the man who was shouting. They looked at me… and then apologized for his actions. They were trying to calm him down and said he was having a bad time. They asked me not to call the cops and let them handle their friend.

 

They started taking him away. I still stood there, still having not said a word.

 

One of them turned to me and asked, “Can you help out?”

 

I didn’t know what I could do to help but I had been given $13 in cash tips tonight. I took it out of my pocket and without a word I gave it to the man. He thanked me and nodded and then went to help take away the screaming man who was now also crying. They dragged him to an underpass and disappeared from sight.

 

Two men came out of the store to ask what happened and see if I was ok. I told them I was fine. It was all ok. Not that I knew if it was or wasn’t.

 

I still am not sure how I triggered the man. Was it my taste in dark clothing and vehicles? Maybe the man was not taking the medication he was supposed to. Maybe he needed medication. Maybe he was angry over some other issue that had occurred in his life and somehow, I reminded him of it.

 

I was not looking for a confrontation with the man. I don’t know if it was something about me personally or if it was something in the air. I do hope he was able to vent his frustration even in some small manner and that he got some help.

 

I don’t know if this is relevant, but the man who first approached me… he was white. The two friends who took him away were both black.